


The Present I Wouldn't Return

by thatnerdemilyj



Series: Em's Femslash February 2020 [24]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Episode: s02e02 A Door Into the Dark, F/F, First Kiss, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:44:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22975072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatnerdemilyj/pseuds/thatnerdemilyj
Summary: Izzy just wants to keep Clary safe. The fact that she loves her has nothing to do with it.
Relationships: Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood
Series: Em's Femslash February 2020 [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1621414
Comments: 7
Kudos: 31





	The Present I Wouldn't Return

Clary glanced up at Izzy and Izzy wished with everything in her that she could make them go away. She cursed Alec to herself for what he had said to her. Clary shook her head and rested her hands on her lap, unable to stop them from fidgeting. 

“Alec’s right. I’m not one of you. I’m just some girl from Brooklyn who went out to celebrate her birthday and came back with a present she never wanted,” Clary started, the words stuttering out with every shallow breath. Izzy crouched besides her and grasped onto her wrist. Clary inhaled sharply the minute Izzy touched her and she thought she should pull away until Izzy spoke again. “And can’t return,” Clary added with a dark laugh. Izzy felt her heart tighten in her chest. She knew Clary was talking about her gift from the angel’s but she couldn’t help but think she regretted everything she had received when she joined the shadow world. 

“You don't want to return that present,” Izzy said, a pleading tone in her voice as she tried to convince Clary to stay. “It’s a blessing,” Izzy urged as she squeezed Clary’s arm in her hand. She needed Clary to believe it because she did. Clary was blessed to join this world and Izzy was blessed just to have known her. 

“Not for me,” Clary retorted quickly as one tear escaped her eye. Izzy reached up and pushed it away. “I just,” Clary started, a soft sob stopping her words. Izzy rested her head against Clary’s arm and nodded, urging her to continue. “I want to feel normal again, Isabelle. I want my old life back,” Clary explained. Izzy nodded as she brushed a few more tears from Clary’s face. 

“I'm sure,” Izzy agreed as she cupped Clary’s face in her hand. Clary eyed her and Izzy saw that she needed more convincing. “But don't you get it? You have a target on your back. The Institute is the safest place for you,” Izzy said.  _ It’s the only way I can keep you safe _ , she wanted to say. All she wanted was to keep Clary safe. “You have a new life now,” Izzy said. Clary looked away from her, pushing against Izzy’s palm and shaking her head.

“What’s so great about this new life, Izzy?” Clary said, her voice filled with frustration. Their eyes met and Izzy stood abruptly, pulling Clary up with her. She held Clary’s face delicately in her hands and pressed their foreheads together, ignoring the small gasp that left Clary’s lips. 

“You have me. And that’s not gonna change,” Izzy said sternly as she looked into Clary’s eyes. Clary nodded and smiled at her, neither of them attempting to step away. Clary brought a hand up to Izzy’s waist and squeezed reassuringly. 

“I love you, Isabelle,” Clary said as she closed her eyes. Izzy’s breath caught at the use of her full name, something that was uniquely Clary and always made her heart soar. The words took a few more moments to process through Izzy’s mind. She had longed to hear them from Clary, but hearing them now had her realizing the love she had for Clary would never be the same as the love Clary had for her. She sighed and let her hands drop from Clary’s face. 

“I love you, too, Clary,” Izzy said back, the passion in her voice missing as she tried to back away. She was stopped by Clary’s hands firm on her back. She looked into Clary’s eyes and something burst inside her. The tears and sadness had been replaced with a fondness that Izzy couldn’t explain, a look of love that had Izzy’s heart stopping it’s beat in wait. 

“You’re right,” Clary said softly as she looked away from Izzy. Izzy held her breath as she rested a gentle hand on Clary’s cheek. 

“About?” Izzy urged Clary to look at her and to explain with one word. 

“There is a present I don’t want to return and a blessing I never knew I deserved in this new life,” she whispered. Izzy let out the breath she was holding as Clary’s lips pressed to hers. She wrapped her arms around Clary’s neck and pulled her closer as she felt Clary’s arms doing the same around her waist. Izzy tried to push every ounce of desire and love she felt for Clary into the kiss, but they broke apart as their smiles overtook it. Izzy let out a laugh as she searched Clary’s eyes. 

“Is it me?” Izzy asked, deciding that she couldn’t be too careful with this. Clary nodded and held Izzy’s face tightly in her hands. 

“Yes, Izzy. It’s always  _ been _ you,” Clary confessed as she pulled Izzy in for another kiss. She both knew what loomed on the horizon, Izzy couldn’t find herself to care anymore. She had Clary and that was the only thing she needed right now. 

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you thought on [Tumblr](https://archeryandeyeliner.tumblr.com/) and [Twitter](https://twitter.com/thatnerdemilyj).
> 
> Please leave kudos if you like it and comment to make me smile.


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